thanks to be the Lord..

2008-10-24T21:41:00.001+08:00

ten "interesting" facts about me

1) i finally bought a mouse!!!!! :) :) no more using touch pad ho ho ho
2) i found GG mint cookies in my fridge. jus when i thought that they are gone! God is good 8)
3) i recovered from vomiting, giddiness, diarrohea, high fever(for a few days!!), headache WOO. the feeling sucks =(
4) tmr is valentin's bday!!! honoured hor?? =))
5) i can go for camp purity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thank GOD
6) i didnt get my eyebrows trimmed today!!!
7) SMALL EARS SMALL EARS =)))))))))))))))
8) i got a turtle today hehe
9) i'm going to be a bridesmaid for my cousin's wedding tmr
10) and i'm having jitters about it =

YAYYYYYYYY im going to thank God for watever i have and endure wat ever ppl i am going to meet along the way.
the joy of the Lord is my strength

2008-10-21T20:19:00.002+08:00

fever
diarrohea
stomach ache
giddyness
vomit

why am i always sick nowadays?? :(
this rly sucks
jus when i have pw dry run to do
and jus when im supposed to pray regularly with small ears

but thanks to those who cares
esp small ears
^^

2008-10-05T23:32:00.007+08:00

YAYYYY
went out to minds cafe today
with yt jerm and wx
FUN FUN FUN~~~~
super fun man!!!
the food's quite nice
games are FUN
and the best thing is
the great company there
and of course
-
-
-
-
-
-
THE PRESENCE OF THE PRINCESS
ME!!!!
haha kidding :)
jus gonna some pics uppppp
pics with my beauuuuutiful face inside
:D
okay
enough of my BHB-ness
(although i know u cant get enough of it=P)
PIGSSSStures

me

me and the BHB

yanting and jermyn

=)

so cute hor

the guys(gays)

me and BHB, again

lil girl and old uncle

yr lil sugar candy!!!

awww~~~

YAY

2008-09-30T22:34:00.002+08:00

guess wat?!
i got caught for my skirt!!!
the teacher immediately catch me after singing the morning songs
and complained that it's too short!!!!!!!!!

SHORT MEH?!?!?

:(

wat the TOOTTTT but who cares mua ha ha ha ha ha ha :D :D :D

2008-09-22T21:09:00.001+08:00

i feel so tired

2008-09-20T10:59:00.005+08:00

i was very very very happy yesterday =))
and suddenly
i feel that everything's gonna be alrite
rite?

is this something i am longing for?
is this the feeling that makes me go dizzy and fuzzy at the same time?
is this wat i want?

questions...
and no answers

but no matter what
ill be by yr side
suporting eachother along this path
facing the music together
making eachother happy
wearing bunny ears
blowing bubbles at the beach
swing until you get dizzy
patting/hitting each other's head
purposely daoing eachother HA HA
watch endless movies even though some sux
walk along the streets like theres no tmr
going for long bus rides that makes our head hurts
enojying the company of one another
PRICELESS

no matter wat happens,
no matter wat we will become,
ill be yr fren forever!!!!
^^
bunny ears
=)

and i hope that we will keep eachother in prayer
everyday
asking the Lord for strength
believing in His plans
be a spiritual support for eachother
i really want that

and till den
i guess everything is in His hands
and theres nth i can do about it
except to have faith in
watever Hes doing
=))

2008-09-06T20:04:00.003+08:00

why didnt i hug you today?
-pulls out my hair-
bubbles was fun with you :) :)
luv luv woottssss

:D :D :D :D :D :D

2008-08-29T18:13:00.002+08:00

I SPRAINED MY ANKLE....................... AGAIN!!! :'( :'( :'(
i cant go back to tkgs/gym/airport =(((
to all my tkgs frens out there: I MISS YOU LOADS!!!!
too bad i cant go back...
sigh
this is sickening really
i cant even get to see you!

Lord please heal my ankle ASAP though it's in a pretty bad state..................

:(

2008-08-28T13:57:00.001+08:00

hello! i jus wanna say that i diarroheaed like mad again in the morning. HOWEVER, i felt sooooo darn good after that. as thought they have been wanting to come out for ages! haha!!

btw. sat was <3 hehe...

2008-08-11T13:59:00.002+08:00

i shitted and diarroheaed in the mornign for more than 5 times!!! can you believe it. ARGH i think i'm gonna die of stomach cancer or diarrohea one day... promos is coming and i'm not prepared at all!! on the other hand, i'm in love with GOD :) amen amen amen!

He is a God that provides forever and ever and ever more...

and yes ppl THIS IS MY BLOG!!!!!!!!!!

=))))))

2008-08-03T10:57:00.003+08:00

i have been shitting in the morning for the past few days. and the strangething is, i havent been eating anything at all for the previous nights, even if i do, it's like super lil. so how could i have shitted anything at all?! and it's diarrohea mind ya. okay, i need to shit and pee again. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO :(

ps. to certain someone: i dun have bladder problem!!! ><

2008-07-21T22:29:00.002+08:00

hoooray i revived my blog :) i'm so dead becos my EOM(evaluate your mothers??) is undone :( i've been blog hopping and thinking why are so many ppl getting attached??? is love rly essential in our very happening life??? hahaha. too bad goodlooking guys are either taken or are flirts!! that fact is damn annoying you know?! haha! i dunno why i'm blogging here again but hooray! i'm blogging here again! doubt anyone wld read though.. hehe...

2007-06-09T19:20:00.000+08:00

S O R R Y

the hardest five letter word. which takes so much courage to express it. yet brings such joy and calmness once u said it to someone.. haha. it certainly alters yr inner ego and change yr inner self eh:) and perhaps.. it makes u more comfortable expressing yr love to yr love ones. haha hopefully den.. whee.

i rly need discipline to studyyyy:'(

2007-06-04T17:18:00.000+08:00

yes, im blessed. miracles do happenX) im back woo!! jeremiah 29:11 huh? yesyesyes:)

im going to study lyk crazy!!! hahahaha

1.Last person who wrote you a testimonial? alex chan.
2.Last movie u watched? spiderman=)
3.What do people first notice when they see you? er i dunno
4.Do you like peanut-butter? no!
5.Most memorable place? haha er. =)
6.Do you read comics? sometimes
7.What's your favorite restaurant/s? i dunno
8.Do you have enemies? no!X)
9. Do you like to go out grocery andshopping? yeah i do
10.Can you dance? sadly no:'(
11.Do you believe in God? yes
12.First thing to do when you wake up tomorrow? go back to sleep
13.Where are you right now? living room
14.Your name spelled backwards... allebasi
15.Where were you born? east shore
16.What is the last thing youdownloaded? nothing
17.Are you rich? no
18.Are you registered to vote? dunno
19.Do you have a car? no
20.Do you like rollercoasters? haha yea!
21.Chattin with...? uncle
22.Would you go bungee jumping orsky diving? orsky diving
23.Are you shy? haha sometimes
24.Do you think you're popular? does it matter?
25.Chips or popcorn? chips
26.Are you a good cook? yea!
27.Best thing in the world? er.. hmms.
28.Have you ever broken a bone? nah
29.Have you ever won a trophy? yeah
30.What is your favorite board game? dunno
31.Do you bake cakes? noX(
32.Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? not sure
33.Do you believe in love at firstsight? maybe
34.Whats your favorite song rightnow? not sure
35.How many pairs of shoes do youown?× 4 to 5
36.Last song stuck in your head? everything
37.Any pets? terrapin
38.Worst Local TV show as of themoment? no
39.Color of most clothes you own...blue! jeans=)
40.Whose picture(s) do you carry inyour wallet? im a pervert. i carry many pictures of my frens=)

2007-05-28T19:05:00.000+08:00

a sudden gust of wind
-

a sudden down kinda feeling. emo.. maybe? nah. it's jus when u realise how screwed things are. screwed up by yrself. and it sucks cos it creates a sinking feeling inside u, with countless of butterflies inside yr stomach, never leaving. gives u a sense of fear, it unlocks yr deepest emotions and throws the key away, leaving u to fend for yrself. jus when u think everything's fine.

it's so not. haha. Lord i dunno how. i really dun. i think i need to find myself back at yr side before even solving or facing other probs. haha..

2007-05-26T17:53:00.000+08:00

micheal buble rocks<3

im blessed to have so many people in my life!! thats you you you you you you. whee=)

(have i woke up?)..

2007-05-21T20:29:00.000+08:00

i have been thinking. really thinking. if im mature.. if i really know wat im doing. the results wont be that bad aye. if i've been really true to Him, if i've been faithful to Him, if i've not been running away frm Him, believing in my own footsteps.

i've been living in a world of my world. world of delusion. without God.

im sick of it.

im sick of all these. it gotta stop. before i go deeper and deeper, believing, living and worshipping the devil unknowingly.

he came knocking on my door, and i let him in.

this seriously gotta stop. only He can remove this emptiness in my heart.

dun u get it isabella? wake up. it's time to take Him seroiusly.. let the fire burn again lyk never before. sigh. i dunno wat the heck i have been doing in the past few weeks, or rather months. it past so quickly. too quickly for me to even stop and think. no, those are jus plain excuses. i had a choice, we all have our choices(so spiderman aye) but did i make the correct one?

obvsiouly not. look at my results. they suck lyk nothing on earth. and now. i have to face the consquences. bear it alone.(even if im not) haha im not even surprised that i didnt even show any signs of negative emotions when i got back my results. im lyk a block of stone. maybe i jus gave up after collecting so many Cs.. wat a dramatic er. change in grades frm last year=D except physics. which i missed A by a small margin. but who am i to complain? i thought i studied. THOUGHT. grrr typing all these jus makes me angrier and angrier. but it's good to vent it here aye. HA!!! im not even upset by my results, i was freakking angry man. good thing i was trained to keep my emotions within hahahaha=DDD thats why you guys out there may be thinking im an emotionless freak who doesnt give a damn about results.

seroiusly, im pissed off mannnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. this sucks.

i need to do bible study. where has all the fire gone? where has the passion fly to? i mean there is still some amount of it left. but it's definitely not enough. i dun want to lie myself any longer. if i gotta wake up. if i wanna make a change. if i wanna MATURE.

i gotta start now.

NOW!!!

bye u fellow frens out there. sigh.

God im so sorry(why has this become so routine like?) but now. im not saying this cos i had to, but i want to. and i pray.. that it will not be too late.

2007-05-15T18:34:00.000+08:00

haha. yay. everyone's doing well for mid years. including my sister. yay. im sooo darn happy. everyone except me. haha.

draw me back..

2007-05-11T19:05:00.000+08:00

disappointing. haha. but it's my fault. cant blame anyone else.. jus gotta pull up my socks and change that attitude of mine. maybe it's becos i have been in a girls school.. lol. ok that doesnt make sense=) hahaa.

presence of fear. hmmms.

where am i again? far away from You thats for sure>=(

2007-04-26T20:36:00.000+08:00

Save me from this place
Heaven knows I'm falling
For you, my sweet embrace
Heaven knows
Heaven knows I've been waiting for you
Waiting for you
- save me, corinne may.

i love corinne may=) oh gosh, her music is so nice, her voice is so powerful!! thanks joanna! for lending me her album=) haha love it man. anyways. mep wasnt good=( owells. study study study!!

-

2007-04-23T18:24:00.000+08:00

ruldolph the red nose reindeer!! hahahah.

ok. so midyears starts off tmr.. hmmms..

i have to do well man, and i will do well! by the love of God=) late nights and cups after cups of coffee.. here i come! haha. and my nose is flowing lyk a never ending tap. all because of the lovely rain! the o so lovely rain that comes in a split second, and gone without the realisation of it. sigh. there are so many things that we cannot grasp, that not meant to be ours. maybe it's meant to be ours, but we jus take it for granted so much that we only realise the presence of it after it slips quietly from yr hands? maybe not quietly. maybe it's jus that u cant be bother to realise it till the later part of yr life.

the flaw of all men: taking things for granted, for taking our blessings for granted. taking advantage of siuations, of things around us. or worse, the people we love. i guess we all need a wake up call. to stop leaving in a lala land of your world. to perhaps, start to think maturely, for the greater good of others. not for yourself only. we are sharing the world anyways. ure not living it alone.

it seems that i've realised and dawned on this so many times that it doesnt leave an impact on me anymore. does writing on this blog help? i have no idea. do i have any idea on wat i've jus typed? i doubt so. things have been hectic, school work, church etc.. have been handling it well. jus feeling stressed once in a while i guess. hahaha. surprises are nice once in a while=)

sigh. the irony of it all.. everything's an irony. but. i still thank God for it. for everything. i know ive been forsaking Him. i have been focusing(yet again) on everything else except Him. felt empty, and know it. yet i havent been doing anything about it. till it became so much worse, so desperate that He came back to me instead. not the other way round. im sorry Lord. i know i always say it but dun mean it. but wat really touches my heart is that You Lord, You came back to me. the filthy hypocrite.

yet will I praise Thee indeed. Lord, i need You more den ever now. in fact, forever and ever.

i need You.

-

2007-04-21T14:22:00.000+08:00

midyears
midyears
midyears

-

woah. it's really coming! ha. seroiusly. sometimes, i really dunno wat i really really want. do i want this, or not? sometimes dear, it's not abt yourself but others. have been tolerating this for so long and yet nothing has changed. dunno how long i can last in this ordeal but Lord grant me the strength. and maybe change her for the better thru me, give me courage to be a true fren indeed.

im tired.

2007-04-15T19:43:00.000+08:00

speechless. haha. i cant put my thoughts into words here again=( owells. at least.. haha. shant say anything more here. for now=)

whee.

i love e thirds!!

deborah, mich, yaoness, charis, joanniiii
you guys totally rock my life man. hahah. owells. syf's over. so i guess it's studies studies and studies now=( u guys made thirds such a fun family to be in! though we may not be the best in our section, i totally never thought of being out of thirds once! cos we are different from the rest! we are positive and cheerful ppl=) deb hahaha. ill never forget ur moodswings which makes band so interesting by watching you:D and mich!! gosh. thanks for joining the band with me in sec2 man. and ure always laughing at me=( hahaha kidding!! ur hard work aspires me to work hard tooX) joanniiii. haha. rmb our constant complaints and all that? we both know that wat we went thru is worthwhile, and we made it by the grace of God too=) love u so much, as a fren, as a sister in christ=) yaoness!! haha. stupid yanyao. always scolding me. bullying me even though im yr senior!!=( hahaha kidding luh=) ure a real good clarinettist! haha. the constant squeaks that we made during combine that set us off giggling everytime is so memorable man=) work hard and lead the thirds!!XD charis lim. woman. haha. yes u improved so much in such a short period of time! see, you can do it! believe in yourself. practise constantly and ull be in the right track=) work hard, ur hard work will be paid off! i can assure that=)
the rest!
drea- hahah i love your eflat clarinet manzzz!! thanks for all the times we've been thru. u sure have been a great fren, inside and outside band. hahah. our talks and all that.. nothing can replaced them=) ure really great. and ur piano skills in playing toccato is.. whoa!!X)
claire- yo woman. haha. love our busrides=) maybe God wanted us to stay near eachother eh=) haha. lead the section well ya. have the faith that God will give u the strength to lead. u can do it man! dun let us down=)
joanna CHO- haha!!! my cellmate. schmate. batchmate! enough said=) haha. no luh. i love u so much too. the giggles we have EVERYWHERE. e sandwiches we bought today are so ex=( hehe!!

i love the rest too!!! the hot babe(alexa), lili, floratoh, kaiyi, laura teh, dionne and daphne teo. lovelove=)
haha. my syf ppl=) love u guys so much.

and the juniors.

ayshah(?), peiwen, hui jia, robyn, maram(?) hahaha. u guys must continue making thirds the happiest and funniest ppl=) ull never regret being a third man. it doenst mean that ure lousy cos ure in thirds. it jus means that ure a funny and positive person to be in thirds! haha k im being lame. but juniors, work hard and make us proud=) e thirds are impt! with the first, seconds and basses=D haha. love the thirds so much.

went through so much. yet the harvest is so deserving. never regretted anything. anything at all. i love you so much. for not giving up on us at all. your determination is an inspiration for us all. u rock=)

thank You Lord, for giving me e strength to survive it all. U made me going. thanks is never enough=)

haha.

heres one of the pics to rmb man
hello dearest deborah!! gonna miss you=(

syf ppl.. where are you charis? roarrr!! X)

THIRDS!=)

i know i look ugly and fat in these pics but i dun care! my love for the thirds is deeper than that. hahahaX)

my other love!!<3

kenneth quek!- u made me break in cold sweat, thinking that you left for taiwan arleady before msging you!! haha. k nvm. u better take care in taiwan man. buy for us some goodies=) meanwhile, have a God blessed time there. and come back to our ministry to play the piano once again!! whee!!hehe.. bon voyage!!

anyways=) i lost my wallet in tampines mall=( but,but, BUT!!! i called the photofinish shop and asked them whether they found it and YES!! they found it=) haha. thank God, praise God!! love Him so much. but i dun want to acknowledge His presence in such situations only. ha.

lalala..

2007-04-12T22:33:00.000+08:00

yo:D

my geog is screwed=( shall attempt to read it again=D midyears are coming. soon. hahaha.. rather scared for english. my languages sucks. boooo but i shall have faith. hahah. rather happy nowadays i guess.

whee..

i love tkgssb so much!! yea man:D

"now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see"
hebrews 11:1

yes Lord.

2007-04-08T19:52:00.000+08:00

and again

and again

and again.

i screw it all up. wats wrong with me man? wat do i really want? arghhh. this is seriously so pissifying. i hate my fickledmindedness.

im sorry for hurting you again and again.

though it doesnt really means anything anymore does it?

2007-04-02T20:21:00.000+08:00

which secondary school (singapore) should you be in?

Singapore Chinese Girls' school
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wat?!?! im supposed to be in tkgs. haha kidding;P

midyears are in less than 3 weeks time. rejoice rejoice! haha. it's really time to pull up my socks. stop slacking. stop daydreaming. stop sleeping. ha. discipline man. sigh.. i think i shld wake up SOON. stop thinking about stuffs that dun concern me. stop thinking too deeply in certain stuffs. certain huh.. sigh. i think i have an identity crisis=X

nah kidding. i dunno wat i am talking about actually. definitely crap. where has my ability to express myself brilliantly on my beloved blog gone?? this is bad. booooo. somehow i feel rly lethargic nowadays. haha. strange eh.

i need motivation, serious motivation.

God! i feel sad. i rly do. actually, i dunno wat the heck have i been doing. wat the heck has my mind been thinking. i cant even make up my own pea sized brain mind! i dunno whether thats right, or wrong. i dunno wat to do. i dunno how to react. wth. haha. but one thing Lord that im thankful for.. i've stopped dozing off while sleeping! woohoo!! im sooo happy for that=) hehe. yes and i beleived that we became closer once again. seriously hope that we(You&i) will continue grownig closer and closer. let me build a stronger relationship with You Lord. for i know, and will always know. that Ure e ONLY one for me. ONLY one there for me 24/7. ONLY one who truely understands me without me explaining to You. U know, and i know that i have a difficulty in expressing my thoughts, but You Lord, U knows them straight away. thank You. Ure my one&only.

wwJd?(thank God, for you too)

;)

sigh.

2007-03-31T19:40:00.000+08:00

when wat u get isnt wat you want.
when life jus turns against ya suddenly.
when decisions were forced to be made.

woo.

haha i dunno wat i want.. really..

confused.

2007-03-25T10:28:00.000+08:00

have i been so childish? such a fool.
--

haha.. apparently i cant view my blog unless i got thru a very tedious procedure=( owells.. but that doesnt stop me frm blogging! hahaha. "i am a flower quickly fading.. here today and gone tmr.. etc" love the song sooooo much. i am Yours! woo!! whom shall i fear if i am Yours? thank You Lord.. that despite everything. im still here, standing in Your presense, praising Your name.

shall continue.. some other day!

2007-03-18T18:39:00.000+08:00

i knew that this was going to happen
i wasnt caught unprepared
--

i was jus merely letting it happen..

nevertheless, snow was great! and nothing, nothing is going to stop me from worshipping You, from praising You, from going to Your holy place Lord.

nothing.

nothing is going to stop me.

nothing can defeat me.

nothing.

2007-03-13T19:59:00.000+08:00

when reality really seeps in, when u found out some things that arent meant to be to ur benefit. when they are happier with others. when ure happier alone. when depression comes creeping in without a slightist hint, when ur thoughts linger negatively.

still You hear me when im calling..
and You catch me when im falling
and told me who i am
-
i am Yours.

and therefore, ill not let my thoughts take over me, ill not fall in to the devil's trap. im blessed. so blessed. Lord i am Yours, wat more can i ask? the world has nothing for me.. yet sometimes i feel that im going round and round in a circle, never reaching a destination. i feel lost, though many love ones are around me. oh Lord only u can help me, only You can stop this. i believe Lord, that Ure the only one that i can lean on, the only one who i admit that im weak.

Youre the one Lord. spur me on!

wooooo! thank God=)!! haha..

who am i?

You Are 55% Normal

While some of your behavior is quite normal...
Other things you do are downright strange
You've got a little of your freak going on
But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

LOL!

2007-03-12T19:21:00.000+08:00

Who Am I
by Casting Crowns

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt
Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wandering heart

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love and watch me rise again
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me

Not because of who I am
But because of what You've done
Not because of what I've done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
Vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
Lord, You catch me when I'm falling
And You've told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

yes Lord, i am Yours..

2007-03-11T10:02:00.000+08:00

finally, a day for me to rest in the Lord with no distractions(i hope)

wat can i say? how to let out? aiyah jus bottle up luh. simple as that! haha!!=P

thank God! for every single thing=) as i continue to tell myself "stay strong, be the strongest among all.." righttt.

2007-03-01T20:04:00.000+08:00

do you know Lord, e feeling that i have everytime this happens? Lord all these stir up my deepest emotions inside of me. causing me to cry out to You. i feel so hopeless, so useless. i dunno wat to do, wat ELSE can i do. i always have this mindset to jus help with all my might, that i can do it, i can help them with my own capability. but i cant. Lord help, this is really killing me. i dun wanna stand there and do nothing. help them Lord, cos i cant. Lord i wanna cry to You over and over again. i dun wanna be a two faced hypocrite in front of You. help me protect them with Your will. help me Lord, to help them.

issit better to give up now. the feeling's great. but the insecurity's still there. the doubt. the fear. yet i long to not let go.. wat if u cant stand after u fall again? owells. hahaha..

was reading something. and i realised how super blessed i am. i always thought that i was strong enough. maybe i am not.. but i know that im not as strong as those people out there. i really thank God for them. thank God for not letting them break despite everything that happened. Lord ure good indeed=) protect them for me.. for im weak in the Lord. yet u uplift me.. im soooo ashamed. super ashamed of myself.. i am selfish. Lord i pray that, ull help them always. for U are their rock now. Ure our rock. be their purpose for living always!! woo. yesssss ill pray harder and harder. ill have the faith, ill believe that Ull be there for there! amen!!

thank God<3

2007-02-27T17:52:00.000+08:00

thank You for the cross

--

thank You for everything, Lord
words cannot express my love for You.

in times of lonliness, sadness, fatigue, i know that You will be there. You will give me the emotional support that no one can. when im feeling insecure, i know that You will carry me. carry me in times of trouble, in times of doubt. though i know that i am a heavy burden, You will not let me go. neither will i ever let You go. Ure my strength, my inspiration, motivation.. my everything. will i be this strong w/o You? will i be so carefree, so optimistic(i hope) w/o YOu? no. Lord i need You. yet theres this fear inside of me, that all my loved ones will leave me. that everything i had will be gone.. Lord i need You. You are my rock. YOu are the only one that will not go.. that will not leave me alone. You know me the best Lord. i am really that desperate for You cos i know that ill be lyk an empty shell without You. a person with no feelings, emotions.. i love You Lord. yet i've been forsaking You.. the world really has nothing for me..

Lord i give You my heart, my soul, my everything.
cos You are the one i live for
You are the reason im so strong
Youre my rock.

thank You

2007-02-24T20:48:00.000+08:00

hello!=) i shall blog about my walk from BEDOK!!(pizzahut) to TAMPINES!!!(my house luh)!!! on 22/2/07!! haha. im so proud of my walk!! hehehehe.

k luh. started walking with joanni from pizza hut back to her house.. which is near bedok resovoir.

found this really cool place near her house..

bedok resovoirr(i dunno how to spell luh=D)

finally! joanni's house!! =) u shld have seen the word JOY written all over her face. HAHA! k then i decided to walk to tamp since it's QUITE near=D
woo!!

the path to.. TAMPINES

yay safra

tampines st 81!

holy trinity!

it was staring at the cute one=)

yumin, my pri sch

tamp st 21! yessss!

201!!

ngee ann

tpjc

another path to.. my house!

esso first:O

YESSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!

i took around one and a half hour to complete this walk! wooo im sooo proud of myself y'know! hahahhahahah yea man!! i shld do that more often to keep myself fit:D hehehehe.

alrightys. my throat is killing me nowadays and more and more coughs have been heard from me! yes, im sick! actually no. it's jus a cough heh heh heh. been eating too much heaty stuff lyk bakkwa/prawn thingy!!/pineappletarts/CHOCSSSS!!! woo! serve me right for pampering myself. hahaha. and deres still SO MANY cny goodies to be eaten!but i've grown sick of them=( i still love chocs though. hahahaha.

sometimes, i jus choose to run away/avoid becos im not scared to face it again. nah not scared. i dunno wat issit. but ya. i jus wanna run away. to the Lord! wooo i love JAMES! james james james james james. the verses are sooo nice i tell ya. it really calm my emotions down.

"blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him!" 1:12

"everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you." 1:19-21

"do not merely listen to the word and so decieve yourselves" 1:22

"submit yourselves, then , to God. resist the devil and he will flee from you. 4:7

I LOVE THIS!
"is any one of you in trouble? he should pray. is anyone happy? let him sing songs of praise. is any one of you sick? he sould call the elders of the church to pray over him and anoint him with oil in the name of the Lord. and the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well: the Lord will raise Him up. if he has sinned, he will be forgiven. therefore confess your sins to eachother and pray for eachother so that you may be healed. the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." 5:13-16

yes i love james. i love God so much it doesnt hurt to cry out to Him at all. o Lord, indeed Ure the only one i can long for, forever more. Ur endless love changed everything. above all else, give me Yourself..

2007-02-09T21:55:00.000+08:00

tears of joy/sorrow

watching my frens cried/laugh/smile/etc after recieving their results is.. overwhelming? ha. watching so many ppl cry before even looking at their results is kind of nerve wrecking. and a year later.. it's gonna be my turn. woo. right.

David said "i saw the Lord always before me beacuse He is, at my right hand, and i will not be shaken. therfore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will live in hope, because You will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay. You have made known to me the paths of life;You will fill me with joy in Your presence."

acts 2:25-18

2007-02-05T19:23:00.000+08:00

ha. pics that reflect my.. ahem.. cuteness!!!=D ok. kidding=)

oh Lord..

im tired. i really am. but with You.. what more can i ask for?

sigh. whee..

Blessed are they who put their trust in the Lord.. psalms 2:12

Your word is my lamp unto my path..
thanks to be the Lord..
with You.. nothing else matters.

the world has nothing for me..

2007-02-03T19:51:00.000+08:00

when all else fails.. i know that Ull be there for me..

for You are my lamp.. e everlasting light.

2007-01-23T21:22:00.000+08:00

lonliness.. we all cant deny it. ha. but nvm.. we can solve it by having Jesus Christ! woooo!! hahahah. so many things to look forward, so many things to pray for. it's endless..

and i really really pray that my parents will go back to Christ.. it seems so darn difficult to get them to agree stuffs with me.. my mum always use church as an excuse for my studies.. yes i feel angry. but can i really blame them? i guess i have to do my part and prove to them that i can study with Christ. or more lyk, i can study thru Christ and Him alone! but i havent been doing my part.. at all.. kept giving in to worldy temptations etc.. sigh.

but thank God for already answering so many of my prayers this year.. really really thank God.. i know Ure there..=D

but school jus always takes me away from You. or is that jus an excusE?

God ur mercy reigns forever

2007-01-22T16:59:00.000+08:00

learnt something..

nothing can be done without faith in Him.

nothing..

2007-01-02T17:38:00.000+08:00

i called
You answered
came to my rescue and i..
wanna be where You are..

2006-12-29T20:19:00.000+08:00

had fever for the last few days.. oh man. kept taking panadol. hahah. and it causes my ear to block easily.. arghhh. pray for me! hahah. manz..

2006-12-25T19:25:00.000+08:00

it's just so difficult when your family isnt christians. it's just so difficult to let them understand. why. sighhh. was so angry this morning, but i prayed and prayed. read verses.

colossians 3:13 bear with each other and forgive watever grievances you may have against one another. forgive as the Lord forgave you.

james 1:19,20 my dear brothers, take note of this: everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

it calmed my heart.. my emotions.. then was deciding whether to go to woodlands or tampines. decided to chiong to tampines. must thank God that i can make it. the drama was good, cried and cried during it.. kept thinking about my family. somehow the drama kind of relates to my family.. pastor rony later talked about family. and i wondered. wat is the problem. why doesnt my parents go back to christ. and suddenly the truth dawned on me. i must change myself, change myself into a better person in Him and let my parents see this change in me. let my parents see wat GOd can do to our family. this xmas, i really pray ill be changed. that my family will be changed.

haha. ok. merry xmas people! this year's xmas was special in a way. xmas eve was good too! free chicken rice with musicians for dinner from joey. free drink from starbucks(again) from douglas! hehehe.

musiclight=)

the sad thing is that my phone got stolen on xmas eve. owells!

cheers!!

2006-12-23T23:02:00.000+08:00

sleeping..

sleeping again..

and again..

...

my dearest sissy

Jesus oh Jesus.. Worthy is the Lamb of God..

2006-12-21T22:57:00.000+08:00

i realised that many people recieved the good progress award. qing went hysterical and called me when she recieved it.. haha. guess that a bit of improvement considered progress? well for my case it does. haha. ok. have to thank God for it. =)

walked down e roads of orchard today.. it was.. cool... loads of tourists and hot jap guys! two of them asked me to help them take pictures..(but did not ask me to take with em):) haha! yep. went to shop in a japanese supermarket. too bad im not a rich tai tai if not ill buy loads of sushi etc.. haha.. i love jap guys!! ahhhs.

haha i think i have a very tired face or sth. met jamie yesterday and she asked why i looked so tired.. hurr.. panda eyes =D hehehehe.. gonna be a busy day tmr again..

2006-12-18T13:02:00.000+08:00

tis the season to be jolly

yes, xmas is coming. hahah. the most wonderful season of the year=) anyways. witnessed a funeral while walking with alvin yesterday. and it got me thinking. where do the buddhists go after they pass on? hmmmz.. then went to 7pm service with joey. and pastor rony talked abit bout passing on to.. then it got me thinking. hahah. hmmz.. yes, it's really a matter of faith. and trust. then i rmbed douglas's nick. trust is not asking anymore questions.. true indeed. i guess we may not understand God's decisions etc but we should trust His choices.. for He is Lord!

for my thoughts arenot your thoughs, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. for as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. isaiah 55:8-9

pastor rony also mentioned these verses.. yeah. then went to starbucks with joey afterwards. got a free drink! it seems that ill always get a free drink whenever i go to starbucks=D haha..

shall study amaths later. sigh, amaths:(

thikning... and still thinking.. oh tripped on sat. had a bloodclot in my toe. prayed about it. and miraculously, it disappeared the next day! thanks to be the Lord!

2006-12-15T13:28:00.000+08:00

feeling really lethargic. slept at 330am yesterday! or even later.

panda me!(they're really cute though)

2006-12-14T15:11:00.000+08:00

judge not, that you be not judged. for with what judgement you judge, you will be judged; and with the same measure you use, it will be measured back to you.

hypocrite! first remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck out of your brother's eye.

ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

for if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. but if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.

wonderful verses.. all from matthew. read the bible yesterday, esp matthew.. was thinking alot in the mrt. forgiveness. judgement. humility. love. if God can accept, why cant i? why let our selfish thoughts control us. why let our own evil desires overcome us. why not let God's love truimph over these tempations, why not let God's love cure all our pain etc.. God You are fair. =) only you can fix my broken heart!=)

smiles=)

2006-12-12T22:34:00.000+08:00

time waits for no one

truely indeed. while we are all procastinating, time jus passes by quickly, without even letting us notice. by the time we are truely awake, it's too late. it's gone..

the sky's so gloomy nowadays, and i love it! i love the darkness that covers us, the rain that falls on us. the feeling, the mood is jus there! hahah i think im going mad. but i really love this weather. call me a sadist(which im not), but i think this weather depicts my mood. righhht. hehe.. but the bad thing is that i cannot swim, cannot run(not lyk i do anyway)!! sigh. but nvm, i can stay at home and watch huang zhu gege! love it! highly recommanded! =) but i've been pretty busy nowadays.. been going out everyday. i really need to take a breather! tired. really tired.. going to die of exhaustion one day..

theres a limit to someone's patience isnt it? haha. been thinking alot again.. went crazy nowadays.. sudden moodswings etc.. am i a changed person? sometimes i really wonder. i must really stop judging people. stop analyzing people! i cant help it. it's a habit already. i should really STOP thinking that i can understand people so well. cos i dun, only God does. only God can judge on judgement day itself..

talked to joanni today bout our parents etc.. some people really dun know how blessed they are manz! it jus gets on my nerve. there i go again, being angry and judging people! darn it!! #**+*)_*_*)((^(^%#$%^#! im getting angry! LOL. gosh i shall stop.

being persuading my sis to go to church! and yes! shes coming again next week! praise God! if only my parents are that easy to persuade too..

no matter wat price i pay
i chose to give this life away

only by the cross i am saved

have i changed?

2006-12-12T10:26:00.000+08:00

life's jus one puzzlement after one another.

how does it feel to not reach your goal? hehe.. learnt alot recently. shall not let my pride overcome me! realised that theres still a long way to go.. a long run in front of me.. shall not let this fall determine my fate! may God teach me this lesson and allow me to improve.. to improve in Him.. for He is my passion, my motivation! woots! bless my fingers Lord :)

2006-12-07T09:43:00.000+08:00

a sleepy face
two very panda eyes
and a strained out look

yep thats me.

i shall go back to sleep..

2006-12-05T22:44:00.000+08:00

finally fifteen..

wishing..

dearest joey and i..

my passion.. for Him..

december- the month of joy, hope and love :)

2006-12-01T20:28:00.000+08:00

hello ikea!

the queue

the big ikea bag

slacking hahah

xmas decors

spread e love..

Isn’t it amazing? Amazed by the very fact by how someone’s passing remark or comment can hurt another greatly, or rather, leave a large impact on her.

Isn’t it amazing? Amazed by the fact by how a strong and stubborn person actually has a soft side. That a person like that can actually sympathize..

Isn’t it amazing? That God sent His only beloved son to die on the cross for us? Just for us, the selfish human beings?

Isn't it amazing? how God can set us free from our misery, our problems, our greed, temptations?

Isn't it amazing? how God's love can turn our hatred into love. our foes to friends.

Isn’t it amazing.

God is amazing.

2006-11-29T23:56:00.000+08:00

was looking thru my pictures.. and found these..

hmms..

in the middle of those super guai people.. haha..

e gay couple..

haha oh my huimin!!

took this with my sissy's new phone!

at the cross..

now that Ure near, everything is different Lord..
so different..

2006-11-28T22:08:00.000+08:00

sighh. one small mistake. arghhhs! my nancy drew ):):

2006-11-26T23:31:00.000+08:00

a bit of sun sea and sand..

big big bullys

my gers..

hear.. hear my cries.

maybe..
jus maybe..
our paths may cross eachother again..

solitude.

2006-11-22T11:55:00.000+08:00

Drinking alcohol is dangerous for kids and teens and sometimes for adults, too. Alcohol is a drug, and it is the drug most abused by teens. Many kids have their first drink at an early age, as young as 10 or 11 or even younger.

They may have seen their parents drink or cool ads for beer and wine. It's easy for a kid to get the wrong message about alcohol. In TV commercials, drinking looks like a lot of fun. You might see people drinking and watching sports together or having a big party.

But alcohol is actually a depressant. That means it's a drug that slows down or depresses the brain. Like many drugs, alcohol changes a person's ability to think, speak, and see things as they really are. A person might lose his or her balance and have trouble walking properly. The person might feel relaxed and happy and later start crying or get in an argument.

What Happens When People Drink?
When people drink too much, they might do or say things they don't mean. They might hurt themselves or other people, especially if they drive a car. Someone who drinks too much also might throw up and could wake up the next day feeling awful - that's called a hangover. Drinking too much alcohol can lead to alcohol poisoning, which can kill a person. Over time, someone who abuses alcohol can do serious damage to his or her body. The liver, which removes poisons from the blood, is especially at risk.
Because alcohol can cause such problems, the citizens and government leaders in this country have decided that kids shouldn't be allowed to buy or use alcohol. By setting the drinking age at 21, they hope older people will be able to make good decisions about alcohol. For instance, they don't want people to drink alcohol and drive cars because that's how many accidents occur.

What Is Alcoholism?
What can be confusing about alcohol is that some grown-ups seem to be able to enjoy it occasionally with no problems. Other people, though, can become alcoholics (say: al-kuh-ha-liks). An alcoholic is someone whose mind and body crave alcohol. The person has little control over his or her drinking and can't stop without help. A person who starts drinking alcohol at a young age is more likely to become an alcoholic.
Alcoholism is chronic, which means it continues over time. It often gets worse, too, because the person may start experiencing health problems related to drinking. In addition to causing liver problems, long-term drinking can damage the pancreas, heart, and brain.

2006-11-21T23:06:00.000+08:00

everything is spinning
and im dizzy
pain pain pain

woohoooooo

gosh the cut's deeper than i thought

hahah

2006-11-21T20:20:00.000+08:00

hurts to know that everyone u hope for isnt the one. loneliness can leads to something really stupid. thinking that u can let everything out in that state is jus desperation. stop it. stop disappointing God. u know u are taking His grace for granted again and again. yet u dun stop. who the heck u think u are? stop it, seriously. ure creating ur own problems. maybe u shld jus think about yourself first before others. ure seriously tired. till the point that ure not thinking clearly, yet u tell others u are. till the point that your health is affected. God cares okay? it's not lyk no one's caring. WAKE UP BELL

-just a thought..

2006-11-21T11:48:00.000+08:00

i never knew it was that.. hard for me.

but now i know. (sigh)

"jimmy gets high tonight.."

2006-11-16T22:25:00.000+08:00

i left everything related to amaths under my table!! dannggg. i dun wanna see yeo during the hols!! booooo ): oh man this really suck. hahah. nvm, fret not! i shall try to cheong everything tmr.. hehe..

went to lynnette's house today! it's the coolest house i ever went manz!!! it's so cool! i dunno how to descibe it here but yeah.. it's cool! haha i wanna stay dere! but then it has so many staircase. fell down again, on one of her stairs.. hurt my sole! ouch manz. have to walk with difficulty if im without shoes! haha i've been falling down for the ()&(^*($*&$(^% time. thank God i didnt hurt my tailbone this time!

jus took some quiz and realised that im enfp again! im always enfp. hhaha. anyway, i borrowed a jap movie called crying out love in the centre of the world. it's really nice. talks about a boy and girl. who fell in love during their teenage years. they're both so sweet luh!! he was always dere for her, and vice versa. omg they're lyk always there for eachother! im so envious!! sadly, the ger has leukemia and although all her hair dropped out and all that, e guy still wanted to marry her. and they're not even 17! haha. they taped wat they wanna say to each other and gave to one another. so sweet right. so if ure paiseh to say sth to her/him personally, u can tape it down and pass to e other party! so sweet!! and e guy is so hot!! haha. i love jap guys!! they are all so hot! haha. maybe i shld cut my hair lyk them! hehehehehe, so not kidding!! anyways, e movie is kinda sad luh. the ger died without passing her last cassette to him. ): and he got it lyk decades later, realising that he hasnt forgotten her. so sweet! how i wish i can have someone lyk him. that accompany to my death! haha. okayyy, im not even 15. i shouldnt be thinking bout all these but.. i jus cant stop thinking how sweet that guy is! how unrealistic though. sighhhh hahah. nvm im sure God has a plan for me!! hehehe!!

i love jap guys!!

2006-11-15T21:26:00.000+08:00

playing cards with charlene and xinxuan is torture. wah piang! so mean! ><

got lost today with no money, and a phone with no reception. took over 4 buses. i knew e way, but i wanted to take another bus due to my overconfidence. went to somewhere i've never been.. got me thinking alot. also felt really lonely for a first time after a long time. i cant deny that i wasnt scared. i was darn scared, but i jus kept walking and walking, as though the walk doesnt ends. and got myself at another bus stop. hahah. my lonely joyride..

maybe God wants to give another lesson. i jus dun learn, do i? or maybe God wants me to do some soul searching myself(which i always do). sigh, sometimes i dun even know wat i really want. all i know is that God is guiding me always.. i really dun know wat ill do without Him. ill be lyk a puppet, giving in to temptations of this "wonderful" world. hahah.. God lift my spirits up!! soul searching really got me thinking alot.. hehe! oh and Lord, protect them for me =)

my inner desires

2006-11-14T19:29:00.000+08:00

Lord i cry out,
i need You now,
more than ever before..

mum was right. im worn out, burned out.. i need a good night rest! woohoo. hahah. been borrowing so many books!! shoik man. haha.

love crapping so much!!! you can jus concentrate on crapping and not anything else. great!! hehe im so crappy. i love being crappy. hmmms..

in the chaos, confusion..

2006-11-12T22:01:00.000+08:00

my nose is dying.. sniff sniff sniff sniff sniff. oh joanna! i lyk that pic so much!! haha. i want the little mermaid dvd!!!!!!!!! but my mum doesnt want to buy it! whyyyyyy ): i really want it! owells ill buy it one day! hahah.

2006-11-12T00:05:00.000+08:00

speechless

a sudden emotion jus gripped me. and i wonder, whether God is asking me to stretch my hand, once again?

disappointment. jus when you had faith in someone, a simple action can jus destroy it all.. i guess it's jus part of life. disappointments, expectations, happiness, loneliness.

but somehow, i dun feel lonely. cos i got the Lord. yet at times, i feel lonely. so empty. and those times are when i ran away from Him. oh man. im confusing myself again. hahah.. the wonder of it all. im jus happy that i can withstand everything. i amazed myself. must thank the Lord for really making me stronger in Him, by Him, thru Him. i can never be this strong without Him. yes, it's very tiring. but i know i got Him, and He will never disappoint me. only the other way round.

we are humans after all. cant blame us for breaking promises, for disappointing others. but sometimes, i really hope that we will at least be mature, or at least try to do something that is right not only to others, but ourselves. something that shows or prove our conscience in us. something that will not allow us to feel guilty. but...

we are human after all, so it's not our fault lor!! - excuses ><

okay i have no righht luhh =X

2006-11-10T22:35:00.000+08:00

i must not get distracted while playing mines!! if not ill lose ): haha.

hmmmms.. i must control. not give into temptations! be different! hahaha.

happy go lucky =))

God Ure the rock that i hold on. making me strong!

2006-11-07T21:53:00.000+08:00

God, thanks for making me stronger..

stronger than before. woohooOoOoOoOo!!! haha.

laugh laugh laugh laugh

laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh

hmmms...

2006-11-06T21:16:00.001+08:00

wish that I could cry
fall upon my knees
find a way to lie
about a home ill never see

my com's so weird.. thought it crashed. then it suddenly worked!! lol. hmms..

wish that i could cry

haha.. i really cant stand scheming people. oh mans. i hate to crawl under them. but then again. God wants us to love.. to love those that hurts us.

fall upon my knees

to forgive those who stabs us in the back. haha was thinking.. dere are so many different type of people in this world. some who really needs people, those who cannot be bottled up. there are also some who gives up on people, who can be bottled up for the time being. and some who jus cannot let it out though they know they need to, if not they will explode.

find a way to lie

owells.. i i know which category i belong to. i think it's so interesting.. the different perspective of lifes. we are humans afterall.. we laugh, we cry.

about a home ill never see

haha e laughter escape.. hehe.

it's not easy to be.. me

2006-10-31T22:24:00.000+08:00

devil wears prada is GOOD. haha.. yep. scary movie 4 is jus so stupid. but super funny! laughed lyk mad. haha. hmmms..

laughter, the best medicine?

2006-10-30T22:47:00.000+08:00

jamming tmr! YES!!!!!!!!!!! cool hehhhh. :)

i jus realised that i lost both of my spa files. thats even more cool. haha.

2006-10-29T10:08:00.000+08:00

is one's sacrifice enough to touch the heart of another?

Your will be done..

2006-10-28T22:23:00.000+08:00

butt hurts alot. booo. fell on the staircase yesterday cos it was slippery. hit my tailbone again! ):): so paiseh. haha. i think my tailbone is going to break sooner or later. LOL.

bowling was fun!! =))

stayed at home the whole day today.. was practically lying on the bed doing nothing. and i cannot really move. watched e last episode of goong. and i cried! my first time crying for a show. haha. cried at the scene when cai jing ran after the car. so touching!! kept rewinding that scene. their love really touches me.

inuyasha rocks tooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! goshhhh. i cant decide between inuyasha or shin. hahaha. oh howl's moving castle is really nice! shld watch it! it's lyk spirited away. very very very nice!!!!!! bout love. howl's so shuai!!! faints faints. but it seems that i can only find those kinda guys in movies or shows. haha..

take off that mask

2006-10-25T22:12:00.000+08:00

I PASSED MY PIANO EXAM!!!!!!!

faints. all glory to You. and a million thanks to my parents.

my mum. who spent dunno how much of money hiring another piano teacher for me. so i have two piano teachers. love you loads! though i never said or show it. i really thank God for you. sorry for failing it last year. and i pray that ure happy that i passed! =))

my dad. who fetched me to piano lessons every single week. who never stop pampering me. who never stop believing in me.

and God. thanks for answering my prayers. i passed! whee!!

went bowling yesterday. was kinda fun! haha. played mahjong at kayan's house today. was fun too! haha. but i never win a single round ): boo nvm ill be pro one day!!!! whee!!!

hahah..

2006-10-23T20:11:00.000+08:00

heys! haha. have been reading alot. =) love reading! woots the joy of reading. have been using ppl's library card to borrow books. haha. yes yes ill return before the due date!! haha. reading really rocks. time jus passes without knowing it when ure reading. haha. too bad i got no money to buy books )': haha nvm can save money by going to the library!

speaking of money$$$$$$$ haha. got 90 bucks from mdm lee! woo!! haha. after so long. well im really tempted to spend on it. but i shldnt =) shall save it. haha. i think the talk on sport bras today is really amusing.. hahah. laughed so much today. am i back? haha. ..

"He is mighty to save.."

been watching gong. the middle part is so much nicer than the beginning!! goshh. haha. kinda lyk it but it's kinda draggyyyyy. hahah lol. anyway. went to 7pm service yesterday. talked about faith. pastor colin was really funny but realistic in the same time. makes me think.. hmmms..

someone wrote on my sis tagboard that he love her?! haha funny!!

"freedom reigns again.."

was thinking again. read sth and realised how much someone wld be willing to give to another person even though they are not worth it. it's not that they insist on holding on or anything. it's jus that they care, they wanna be there. was wondering, and still wondering. as an outsider, i guess i can understand. but i dunno wot to feel for them. sympathy? maybe. sometimes all someone wants is jus someone who will be there for her. sometimes all they want is jus a person who cares. read something from a book, "if you cared for somebody, then you were vulnerable." so true. she may take something that was broken and make it whole again. haha how weird. humans.. is it bad to show your vulnerable side? hmms. how strange. a person can jus change you. haha observing people can be meaningful. shows you a greater picture than wats seen on the surface. you cant help but to laugh or cry with them. anyway, im jus an outsider. and it's cool to be one =) it jus amazes me..

"praying it please.."

the human mind is jus so interesting.

oh Lord You've set me free
from this unrealistic fantasy
now this illusion that i had
is nothing more than a memory
a sweet, sweet memory..

God i admit, i've been putting a brave front even though im weak..

2006-10-18T22:26:00.000+08:00

im so tired. physically. haha. the sudden loss of blood is making me really weak. really really weak. physically. legs are lyk jelly. hehe. jus ate my dinner. fell asleep while watching inuyasha!! slept from 6 plus till 9plus. and i still feel lyk sleeping!! gosh. im sucha pig. hehe.

would you give yourself up for someone?
or would you give someone up for yourself?

wat goes up must come down heh.

i lyk this quote-" i may be alone physically but i know im never alone spiritually"

yes, i do feel alone but wat the hack la. i dun care anymore. i got God.. haha.

thoughts that really hit you. im jus glad. not happy but glad. cant deny that deres a tinge of sadness somewhere. but yah.

maybe one day, when everything comes into light. ill be able to thank God fully. wholeheartedly. and ill be able to cry. to break down. and not hide.. to God =)

an island again.

2006-10-17T21:29:00.000+08:00

mep practical was rather surprising. got an A. hahah. must thank God! goshh love ms ng! hahahah. music writing was..... hmmms. owells. jus thank God it's over.

when a thought strikes. it leaves you thinking. haha. i love thinking! makes me knows wats going on. makes me realise and understand things better. it's jus interesting to look at someone and wonder bout their life. a perfect stranger can jus leave their footprints in your heart.

you can look at someone's faces and try to know wat they are feeling. try to guess. try to be in their shoes. a whole new different experience for every person. haha so fun to understand others. not only it will affect you, it can change you.

trying to not let my emotions take control of me. sighh =)) haha.

2006-10-16T20:45:00.000+08:00

omg im freakking out over mep!!! darnnnn. darnnn. i jus realised that my mep pract is bringing me down down DOWNNNNNN. i jus rmbed that my leg was shivering so much while pressing e pedal cos my muscles ache lyk mad!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! CRAPPPPP!! my paper is definitely not bringing e results up. gosh. so dead. oh gosh.

stone.

2006-10-16T20:23:00.000+08:00

i could sing of Your love forever

hmms. life goes in circles. wat you see may not be wat you get. but sometimes, wat you see is wat you get. wat u want, may not wat you truely want afterall. wat u thought u never want, may be wat u need. haha. confusing eh. but so true. life's an irony. u may hate someone so much, only to find out that u trust her after some time. after some time, you will realised that wat u've tried so hard for, worked so hard for may not be the one you need in your life. life is so much more. it doesnt jus focus on one thing. life moves on. it doesnt stop at a certain point. no point lingering at that point. only making yourself upset, depressed bout it. think clearly. think smart. look at things at a Godly perspective. look things in a different way. you are wat you think. your thoughts mould you. haha. so weird! i think e way God plans our life is so weird, yet so amazing. He plans in a way ill never thought of. yet His plans are e best! oh Lord. haha. i dunno wat happened to me, but im sure you know. You understand me e most. at least You wants to.

come again Lord, wash over me.

we shld jus thank Him for everything that happened. stop living in e past. stop hoping. stop asking why. start giving thanks instead. then ull realise how beautiful life is. how wonderful e Lord is =))

results out tmr. hmmms. jus pray that i can take the blow. lol.

destiny~

2006-10-14T21:28:00.000+08:00

headache

gosh this headache is killing me. ahhhhhs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-10-13T19:08:00.000+08:00

resistance.

went out today! with joannnniii =)) haha. we met elizabeth and xiaoxuan and took neos! been ages since e last time i took neos. haha not that enthu bout it le. cant believe i took over hundred of em last year! haha. and this year i took lyk less than ten times?! haha. lol. spent five bucks on it. lol. went to bugis street to shop. haha joanni and elizabeth bought clothes!! im lyk e husband watching them trying on clothes -_____- sorry i jus dun wear dresses, spagetthi stripes or tubes!! haha so i refused to try anything frm that shop. lent joanni TWENTY bucks!! haha. heartbreak. no la kidding. den later lent elizabeth TEN bucks!! wahseh, im lyk loanshark lyk that. haha. my poor money.... haha. didnt get anything for myself except food! LOL. i love food!! whee..

legs ache super alot. muscles esp. ahhhs and my right hand cant even lift up heavy stuffs!! every walk hurts again. ): guessed i shldnt have walked so much today.. owells. im not weak. :) hehehehe..

anyways. INUYASHA ROCKS!!! hes mine hes mine hes mine. omg he can protect me from anything, anything!!! hahahahhahah gosh gosh gosh!! ill lyk argue with him every single sec but i dun care!! hahahah his stuborness makes me lyk him more!! faints. oh why cant he be real?

sighhhh.

those thoughts are literally haunting me. coming back again and again, forcing e to rmb. to live thru that moment again. haha. u cant bring me down. u wont make me fall. ill be strong!!

my anger is lyk the basaltic magma in e volcano, ready to erupt any moment. any moment. shudders at e thought of exploding. help, help me keep it in please.

God, what kind of person i am now? ease my heart Lord. only You..

2006-10-12T22:38:00.000+08:00

patience

jus watched 13 episodes of inuyasha! goshh. haha. he is LOVE. omg e way he always protect kagome is LOVE. plus hes so macho and cute!! goshh goshh goshh!! haha. im getting high cos of him! why cant he be real. if hes real hes mine! haha x) he can save me! woohooo!!

boredom! haha. im jus so into inuyasha. gosh hes e person i want. haha. though hes such an idiot!
he thought that he can be strong and not tell kagome bout his weakness! pls lor. everyone is weak in a sense. u think ure helping yourself by being strong and keeping mum bout it?! ure so WRONG! ure making situations worse u idiot. u cause e whole grp to be in danger! u hurt others! who dyu think ure man!!! inuyasha ure so stubborn. u think u can survive this alone. sigh. but i still lyk you! ure my hero!! haha =))

money is jus another temptation. it's leading us to the drain. dun u get it? dere are more things to life then money dear. e "money" is blinding ya.

i ate e candy too quickly. now deres no more left. yet i dun want another one, i dun lyk candys in the first place.

2006-10-12T16:19:00.000+08:00

hey backs! haha. watched inuyasha. i shall devote my time to watching inuyasha. my one and only inuyasha!!!!!!!!! faints. please rescue me!! haha. i wanna be kagome. LOL. hahahahah.

both of my legs, right hand and butt hurts loads!! every move u make is lyk a stab. goshhh it's so pain. haha. be strong!!! lol.

okay i shall go back to watching inyasha!! woohooo hes e one!!! lol.

2006-10-12T11:27:00.000+08:00

the way things go is so strange. you can be so happy for a moment, and next ull be heartbroken. it jus becomes a process eventually. but wat if something jus happen to you suddenly? u dun even have e time to stop and think, or be prepared for e worst. u jus flow with time, enjoying those happy moments, thinking that they will never end. even if they do(which they will eventually), ull be glad that those moments actually existed. but wat bout the aftermath of it. can u handle it, can u handle the pressue, the torture of it? will u continue longing for it, or to let go? life's lyk that anyway. move on. but isit that easy? wat if u held on so much, u put in so much hope. so much heart into it. isit easy to give up lyk that? hmmms. im sure no one wants to give up. but if one party already did. isit easier for e other to give up? or harder? disappointments. heartbreaks. deceptions. illusions. are they jus illusions. another wishful thinkings. one moment and it's gone. in a blink of an eye. are those happy moments jus another part of an illusion? if it's not, wat is it den? or is it too fragile to hold on.

is it a lie to tell yourself it's okay. jus close it again. though it's opening itself without u knowing it. maybe closing it is the best solution. but it's so hard when it opened itself without me knowing it after been closed for a freakking long time. i dun wanna complain, dun wanna blame. if i have to blame, i guess i can only blame my heart. who asked it to give in huh?!? haha. yeps. jus takes time to close it again. i know it doesnt wants to be. but thats the only choice. sorry heart. it's over. ill be there for myself again.

thank God for everyone.

it's jus too good to be true.

2006-10-11T19:43:00.000+08:00

wait

i forgot the things that i have to rmb
yet rmb things that are better off forgotten

life's contradicting.

who am i to comment? lol. much as i want to, i cant. i guessed theres jus a line that cant be crossed.

woooohooooo.

it's over! but then... ): theres a price to pay for evertyhing ehh!! boo.

butt, hand and legs hurt. but gonna stay strong!! whoohoo!! hahaha.

boy it hurts alot!! otulP gone!!!!! sigh...

e last battle..

2006-10-10T17:42:00.000+08:00

oh my. im so tired!! i can jus fall asleep now. haha. drank 3 cups of coffee yesterday! kept diarroheaing, hyper ventilating and feeling nauseous too. was sick i think. then today morning was kinda asthmatic!! oh my. coughing in e night again.. boo. haha. physics was okay but i cant believe how many careless mistakes i made! roar!! lol. nvm.

kena scolded by an old man in the bus. kinda pai seh but it's an eye opener. never happened to me before. haha was angry for a few secs but now i think it's very funny. owells. strange. =))

geog!! oh my. gotta study again..

till the last battle is won..

I need You more then breath
You're my hope in You I live
Angels worship at Your throne
Power and Glory to You alone
My Saviour Glorious one
My Redeemer Living in my heart
Now and forever Your Kingdom come

2006-10-08T15:15:00.000+08:00

Hold my hand and walk with me
You're the Light that makes me see
On this path my soul You lead
O my Shepherd walk with me

2006-10-08T15:06:00.000+08:00

hey guys. haha lol. went to 9am service with chinny today! haha one more week to go and i can go back to speedlight! hehe.. oh parachute band is comnig to LEW! cant wait! =)) so many exciting things happening haha..

macbeth is okay but it's really making me sleepy!! ahhs kinda scared for physics and emaths. ahhs. alrite. gotta continue studying peeps!!

ciao =) yawn..

2006-10-06T01:07:00.000+08:00

yo manz! it's one plus! =)) haha. i think my body is getting tired but my brain is wide awake! haha cos i slept at seven plus to ten plus pm jus now! lol. dun wanna study now. shall start tmr! amaths wasnt a killer. but why, why why why do i have to blank out. lyk literally blank out. goshh. den i forgot to change my mode from radians to degrees back. lyk wthack?! i could have got the answer right. and it may be a matter of pass of fail. so disappointed. so angry at myself. but owells. it's over. let this be a lesson. may it not happen again!

geog was okay.. realised it's equatorial and not monsoon for the climate. ahhhs! but den nvm. hopefully my other questions will pull me up.. haha. really pray that i pass. i think i put in more effort for geog this term than the other three.. lalala. haha.

amaths ):):): oh man i really wanna bang myself against the wall man. wahh so pissed at myself !)(&(@&#()%!@&*(#%!&*(@%#&*(!%@!(#)!*@+!*!_**!!!!!

LOL. alrite. anyways. kan and i were supposed to practise our pieces for mep. but then the mep rooms are locked. and deres a sign saying wat try your luck. lol. haha so kan cannot take her bass so we were so bored and we did something. it was so funny. haha my prediction was right!! hahahahah omg. den went to her house, but had nth to do so i went to cut my hair downstairs. haha the hairdresser super talkative. they(kan and him) kept bullying me!!! watever manz. anyway, i cannot tie my hair le!! whoohooo. think i look lyk jap guy!! haha. lala.

watching tv now. the show is lyk so amusing. made me laugh lyk mad. haha. anywayz, been sleeping super late nowadays due to exams. suprisingly, i was really really stressed out yesterday only. lol. was kinda stressed in the morning too. wasted my money for nothing, for NOTHING. roarrr. stupid amaths!!! ahhhs. lol.

i guess i can do nothing now. it's time to leave everything to God. for i know HIs plans for me are always good.. =))

to mr. Sa Tan, i wont fall into your trap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-10-03T15:58:00.000+08:00

i swallowed a prawn shell!!!! omg freaky!! how to get it out?!??!??!! goshh!!

geog amaths geog amathst geog amaths ):

2006-10-02T00:13:00.000+08:00

my mum's super stressed, maybe depressed
my dad's super bochap, maybe he gave up
my sis dunno anything, maybe she does, but shes only 12

and im forced to hide everything inside. sighhh.

God im jus glad that i got You. thanks for letting my mum come into Your house today. although she doesnt know the goodness of it..

haha. gonna sleep late! yay. panda eyes =))

lalala..

2006-09-30T23:12:00.000+08:00

u left the door open woman..

theres nothing left to be said. hah like real!!! lol.

lalalala. heck care right? LOL.

2006-09-28T10:08:00.003+08:00

haha today's polling day hol! cool eh! haha lol. lalala im bored. i know im supposed to be studying. but owell. i will study after my lunch and sleep super late today ok? haha. alrite i dunno wat to blog abt so i shall blog abt ipp since many ppl blogged abt it. thought it will be lyk immediately after recess. but it's lyk the last period only?! haha wanted to slack or at least study ss during the thingy. haha. was sweating lyk a pig while pasting masking tape everywhere. i keep hearing ppl saying "there got hole!", " that place got hole already!!!" haha so funny can. i know my skills in pasting suck haha. they wanted to lyk cut the garbage bag but i jus tore all of em. hahah. that kinda explains the presence of so many holes. hahahaha. omg i want ipp again!! think it's super funny. and we played murderer!! whoo. haha. owells. changed seats already. sitting beside sharm and char. they better wake me up if im sleeping mans. lalala..

going to watch movies at home soon!! whoo!!! hahah. i know my attitude is.. ahem.. hahah. and yes, finals starts tmr. whooo hooo... rejoice man!! hahah. oh man i think im going crazy. im laughing at every single thing now.. it's all richard LEES fault!! hehe.. currently so hooked on jay chou too. he surely get full marks for practical, music studies and composing if he was in my mep class.. if only he was!! boo hahah. hes so talented la!!!!!! haha. but some of his songs are weird. but who cares.. =)) hehe..

alrite.. think i better do some bible studying too. sighhh. God all i want is You.. ill study for You.. with Your wisdom.. =)

2006-09-27T21:23:00.000+08:00

my gum hurts aloT!!! boo. anything one thing to rejoice..
my piano exam is OVER! whoo. richard lees rock my socks!! hes super funny. we kept laughing. hahah. lyk laugh for no reason. he was very confused by me!! hehe. but i lyk him alot! haha den i asked him whether hes related to benjamin lees, a composer. he said that many ppl asked him that but sadly he is not. den we both started laughing. hahahah. really pray that ill pass =))

lalala. gum hurts!!! ): hehe. doing mep composing now.. ss on fri! whoo. cant wait for it! x) LOLOLOL. hahahah everything is so amusing =pPpP

2006-09-24T16:17:00.000+08:00

oh i should jus stop blogging. hahahha. this is lyk the third time. well anyways. i studied physics!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! omg i wrote down so much notes. im so bluddy proud of myself!! hehe. i shld jus get those depressing thoughts outta my head. jus help ppl la. help ppl will die meh??? hahah. going to have piano lesson later but my dad havent wake up yet! so how to fetch me there. boo.

hahahahahhahahahhahahahahahhahahah oh MY. (:

lalalalalalalala. i wanna be that fool. =)

2006-09-24T15:08:00.000+08:00

What kind of Friend are you? (finished with pics)

You are a great friend, and it shows. You are willing to do anything for friends, just to make them happy. But this mainly leads toward the sex you prefer. But you would still do anything for any friend, even aquantences. This can lead to you being walked over all the time, and letteing people take advantage of you. But your the best friend to have.
Take this quiz!

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yah right. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL =PPPPPPP

2006-09-24T10:16:00.000+08:00

english- not planning to study
ss - havent started
mt - no planning to study
chem- started due to the demands of my tution teacher
amaths - started a lil, and realised that i've forgotten most of them. how pathetic.
geog - ROARS(&^(^%G%@+(+*_*#!&((!*^#*(!^*(!!!!! I DUNNO HOW TO FREAAKING STUDY THIS KANASAI SUB!!!!!!!! WTH.
maths - havent started
lit - havent started
physics - started due to the demands of my tution teacher.
mep - started practicing on the piano, but then i also got my piano exam. ahhs. havent started revising.

anyway, i found this.

What Emotion Dominates you?

Lonliness dominates you. You can hide it well, but its there, and your friends can see it. You constantly feel alone, and need to do things to fill your time. Your afraid to tell people this, but sooner or later it gets out in a bad way, and you think you screwed up everything. And when you are in love is when you are sad the most. (Please Vote)
Take this quiz!

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hahahahhahahha LOL LOL.apparently, im supposed to memorised the whole physics and chem tb by today cos my tution teacher is going to test me TONIGHT. lyk wthack, i dun have sucha a big brain. anyways. not going to church later. ): boooooo. sigh so im going to be a nerd today. but obviously, i cannot study and study without doing anything else. haha. so ill be smsing again. boooooooo. oh i can sms with my phone le! yay. watched a cheena ghost story yest. super funny. was a bit freaked out in the beginning, but somehow i managed to laugh my way thru the whole movie. used to hide behind pillows whenever i watch this kinda movie. but somehow im not scared of this kinda movies already. i guess i have the faith of the Lord and i know that this kinda things dun scare me anymore. lol. have an urge to watch scary movies with my frens cos i wanna see them scream and cry while i jus sit there laughing lyk mad. haha kidding, im not that mean. oh yah, i did something really funny yest due to boredom. hahahah. i wanna do sth to cheryl's and char's photo so i started finding them in my wallet. den i saw two photos stuck together, i must like pull them apart nicely to prevent them from tearing. hahahhaha den i was laughing lyk a mad hyena cos those photos were... =)))!!!! HAHAHHAAH. omg so funny can. den i did the same thing to cheryl and charlene photo. anyway the idea came from charlene. haha. im jus copying it. hehe =P okay i know im rather mean, but i cant help it. i need to be amused. hehe.

alrite. i gotta study. ):

2006-09-23T19:29:00.000+08:00

it's been two months since the battle of the bands! oh man times really flies.

i've been running away for so long, my legs are tired. someone pls carry me. oh God im depressed. ):

run ger run
run away
dun ever let reality catch up on you

run ger

run..

=) smile. lol so fake. hahahahahahaha. LONER ME!! :DDDDDDD

2006-09-23T10:38:00.000+08:00

Dear God, thank you for loving me. Thank you for this day, and the beautiful world I live in. thank you for my family and friends to play and share with. Thank you for my church and for those who are teaching me. Dear God, help me to do what You want me to do. Forgive me when I do wrong things- when I hurt myself and those around me. Forgive me when I hurt You. Make me want to be the very best that i can be. In Jesus name I pray, amen.

im confused. sometimes its jus so easy for me to understand people, and sometimes it jus hurts to be that easy. knowing that much isnt good. i cannot block them out, i cannot help them. haha but i must thank my Creator for tht gift. maybe He wants me to help people, to be there for others even though people might reject. after all, life's about helping one another. life's about people. you cant survive without them. it's a gift to be there for others. a blessing actually. yay. i must think positively. cos if ur frens arent, u must be there to put a smile on their face! whee. hahahahah.

~~sigh. will anybody be dere for me though. nvm. hopefully, i wont fall earlier than i expected. cos i know no one will be there to pick me up, except~~ God. ironically, i wanna fall, i wanna let it all out. i wanna see who's there to help me. but i know thats sth impossible. haha. oh my. alrites. shall be strong and be there for others instead. stop that self pity bell.

EOYs is in 6 days time. piano exam is in 3 days time. oh man. i've cheong lyk mad again. i really dunno how to study geog. i really really dunno how. i know i shld not give up on it yet. sigh. caught in the middle again. im super stressed out becos of my piano. i cannot fail cannot cannot fail. i know how much trouble ill bring if i fail. all the threats. sigh. jus have to be prepared for the worse rite. im so sick of everything suddenly. sighh. alrites. i shall go back to studying/practicing my piano.

oh God pls let the tears flow. somehow i cant let it out at all. it's very tiring to keep everything in. i need You.

2006-09-17T23:16:00.000+08:00

it's very frustrating when my mum scolds my dad for such a small teeny weeny matter. lyk wth. must scold meh. lol. adults are getting too stressed out. and wat's worse is that i cannot do anything except to stand there and watch. it's super frustrating to jus stand dere, knowing you cant do anything to help although you care like mad. haha.

im so hooked on home. and youre beautiful by james b. hahah.

bro sam told me that speedlights never know how fortunate they are. so true la. some ppl cant even come to church even though they want to. lol.

the world is sucha contradicting place to live. i wanna go dere and live instead. LOL. hahah.

bible studying!!!!!!!!!!!!!! gotta have bible study again. sigh. God i cant deny that i drifted. but ill run to you as fast as possible again. although Ure jus beside me.. God help me. =)

2006-09-16T19:07:00.000+08:00

every fall leaves you stronger
every hope broken leaves you hurt
every sacrifice you made leaves you wondering
why are you even doing this?

hooked on the song home by michael buble. haha. life's so hectic. i wanna stop and take a breather. i dun wanna have any more. sometimes, being strong is so tiring. but u wanna be weak meh? lol. u jus have no choice.

jus leave everything inside again lor.

i need coffee!!!!!!!! lol.